how do you do I, see you've met my

faithful, handy man.

[two hundred, forty-six]

Today is move in day for residence on campus, and since I live not too far from the campus I have a large incentive to not leave my house today. Traffic, pedestrians running around streets with fans and suitcases and mini fridges, tables, etc. I went through that last year, and this year it will entail me not welcoming everyone into my building and ultimately being ignored, but by writing and knitting and watching movies and dancing, more positive all around.

I cannot say I'm giong to miss being in residence, I liked the feeling and atmosphere of always having someone around the corner or in the bathroom, but I needed my alone time. A lot of people in res maintained a steady, constant running relationship with everyone that last from one am to one am, all day erryday. I thought this was weird, and continue to do so, and therefore I remain alone in my space, in my own room with my two lovely room mates, but apart all the same.

I would rather have friends that I could call on then be obliged to constantly be with people all of the time. There are few people that I feel could successfully maintain good conversation for a long time, and especially with me, I'm going to say I only know a handful of people who entertain me for that long, or could hold a conversation with my insanity for that long. Usually people get sick of me.

Which is actually okay with me, I like to talk and be around people, but I could go for a whole day not speaking to anyone, sometimes I actually need that just to gather my thoughts. Residence drives people nuts, and I warned some people going this year that they should make sure they have alone time, otherwise they will go batshit psycho, and although it isn't uncommon, it is still a scary thought.

Anyways, just a dip into my psyche of alone-ness. Otherwise I'm doing alright in my life, classes start next week so I've been taking it easy lately, not really investing too much into anything. I have been having an ongoing internal battle with my feelings, and if I need a break or if I am kidding myself and am just trying to block out insecurity. Maybe it is best to just sit tight for a while, figure things out, and try not to burst into tears every time something goes wrong, which is becoming a harder concept to grasp as this whole school year seems to begin.

Anyway, hope your day is as relaxing as mine,

cheers,

Jess :]