[two hundred, eight]
I was on the way home from work today and had a great idea for today's blog, and I was so excited to get home and type it all out, but today turned out to be just a huge disappointment both at work and in other aspects. I feel like I've been let down, looked down on, and completely disrespected all day. I don't bitch about it, I don't tell people that I'm not perfect or try to make other people feel like shit, but I do note it down, take it into account, that I don't feel fantastic today, and I had a lovely positive post planned, but I think it's going to be different, I guess.
What is it about negativity that draws so many followers? It seems to reel people in, tie the lasoo tight around the necks heads and mouths of those who are most vulnerable. Why do young people dig into it, get down deep in negativity and truly believe that that's the mindset that they should approach? Probably follow by example...
To be perfectly frank, I've decided that if you are negative, and you are down and intentionally manipulate people's feelings to feel down, or are insensitive, you're full of shit. You've had this happen to you before, and I feel like I have never intentionally made anyone feel like shit, or wanted to do so, or meant to, or really anything of the sort, and I don't think it's fair. What, life isn't fair? You know what's not fair? Diseases, deathes, famine, poverty, homelessness; you have a great life if you're reading this because you have a computer and internet and are literate, think baout that for a bit.
Sorry for going on a little rant, I've decided to be positive and if you know me at all you know that I need to be positive in order to continue to breathe everyday. I don't plan on cheering up tonight, so I'll continue on with my reading and politics papers, and figure out some cheery thoughts for tomorrow in order to make it to... I don't even know. There's nothing to look forward to right now, I am trapped. I am stuck in the sand the quick sinking sand and I try to climb out but the grains tighten around my body and pull me down, choke me, and force me into negativity.
Nay Negative, pray positive.
Let's all take a chill minute, that seems to be a trend lately in these, just take a chill pill, maybe some solid comfy crooning, I'm feeling Tony Bennett today, and just take a breather to continue to string out my thoughts. I need to figure out what's going on up there, before I can feel less unsettled, and more positive.
Take care,
Jess :]
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