[one hundred, fifty-four]
I love torrents because now I can read what I want. I want to read books and stories about people that aren't old and rusty, I want to read the stories about things that are meaningful, or aren't. I am literate, I enjoy reading, I enjoy stories, I enjoy hearing people's words. I'd rather read with my eyes, but that's not the way in my plan anymore, so I read with my ears and I deal with it. It isn't the same. You should try it and see, if you can't sleep it's perfect.
I just downloaded a Jack London novel called 'the call of the wild' and I can't wait to start it. I also downloaded Oscar Wilde's 'Dorian Gray' and that is exciting to have as well. I can't wait to read like a normal person someday. I love it, I miss it, it's like a part of me hasn't been awake in a year.
Like sleeping for a decade and awaking to the world changed to inverse, black and white shades, for if you look deep enough into the earth's dressings it is only lust and suffering. Take a step away from the sunglassed highbeams and rub them a little, the world's still here, sitting, waiting, starving. If you've got a treat show it some love, if you've got some suntan lotion it's ready to be protected. Pass the peace, please.
MUAH, this is me, bein' caught up
Jess :]
Friday, June 3, 2011
BEAM ME UP
[one hundred, fifty-three]
Once upon a time there was a little old Lady who lived in a large mansion alone. She wore red dresses and purple lipstick everyday, and always wore her beautiful jewellry. She walked, everywhere, and whistled as she went, carrying her purses and sunhats and shopping bags. She liked to drive her car to the mountain nearby, and sit and watch the stream pass her, and get out and listen to the birds. One day this Lady found a small blue bird sitting on a ledge by the stream. The bird would not look away, it say staring at the Lady for hours. The Lady stared right back, not backing down. A couple of hours in she tweeted one whistle, and the bird jumped. It had been taken a-back from its interuption. The Lady smirked softly and got back into her car. She was predictable, all right, but she knew how to blow someone's mind once in a while. The bird sat, bewildered, and tweeted once in the Lady's direction. They were in mutual trust of eachother, content with their lives, content with their happiness. The Lady went home, the bird flew away, and the world kept on turning.
Jess :]
Once upon a time there was a little old Lady who lived in a large mansion alone. She wore red dresses and purple lipstick everyday, and always wore her beautiful jewellry. She walked, everywhere, and whistled as she went, carrying her purses and sunhats and shopping bags. She liked to drive her car to the mountain nearby, and sit and watch the stream pass her, and get out and listen to the birds. One day this Lady found a small blue bird sitting on a ledge by the stream. The bird would not look away, it say staring at the Lady for hours. The Lady stared right back, not backing down. A couple of hours in she tweeted one whistle, and the bird jumped. It had been taken a-back from its interuption. The Lady smirked softly and got back into her car. She was predictable, all right, but she knew how to blow someone's mind once in a while. The bird sat, bewildered, and tweeted once in the Lady's direction. They were in mutual trust of eachother, content with their lives, content with their happiness. The Lady went home, the bird flew away, and the world kept on turning.
Jess :]
nineteen fifty five, the birth of rock and roll
[one hundred, fifty-two]
I would like to take the time right now to just say, that I want to conquer my fear of bridges sometime soon. Like go to that huge bridge over Niagara and stand there, are you allowed to do that? I doubt it, but it seems like I should start getting over all of the things I'm afraid of. Bridges seem like a good start to me as any!
I don't want to go on Fear Factor and get in a bin of snakes or bugs, although those are my huge fears, or just be in a dark basement alone, or run out of time. I just want to stand on the edge of a bridge and look down, and freak out, and then grab hold on the railing, and know that I am okay.
Why you may ask? Because I look into the face of so much in my life, everyone does, and what some people just don't believe is that they're going to be okay. You're going to be okay. Whatever this life throws at you, you have people who will hold your hand, or make you laugh, or buy you a popsicle if you need. You're not alone, and you're going to be okay.
"All I can do is keep, breathing" Listen to Ingrid Michaelson, she's pretty rad.
love always,
Jess :]
I would like to take the time right now to just say, that I want to conquer my fear of bridges sometime soon. Like go to that huge bridge over Niagara and stand there, are you allowed to do that? I doubt it, but it seems like I should start getting over all of the things I'm afraid of. Bridges seem like a good start to me as any!
I don't want to go on Fear Factor and get in a bin of snakes or bugs, although those are my huge fears, or just be in a dark basement alone, or run out of time. I just want to stand on the edge of a bridge and look down, and freak out, and then grab hold on the railing, and know that I am okay.
Why you may ask? Because I look into the face of so much in my life, everyone does, and what some people just don't believe is that they're going to be okay. You're going to be okay. Whatever this life throws at you, you have people who will hold your hand, or make you laugh, or buy you a popsicle if you need. You're not alone, and you're going to be okay.
"All I can do is keep, breathing" Listen to Ingrid Michaelson, she's pretty rad.
love always,
Jess :]
shake me real tight like, son
[one hundred, fifty-one]
I want to be soaring in the clouds like a bird someday, high in the sky someday, I'd like to be free as a bird someday. Not free falling, just freedom. I think the meaning of that word has been lost lately. If you know one thing you know them all, right? I think that's the definition of a smart ass. Have you ever chosen to look from a different perspective before? Like from a bird in the sky. I want to look down and see it all, live through it all, fly through it all.
I think it is most important to realise that we are birds, we all are birds. We shit everywhere, go too fast, flap too hard, and some of us sit in the high parts of the trees and just sit. Content. Be content you say? Yes, content. Content may not be synonimous with happiness, but for pete's sake it's damn better than going too fast. I can't see much, so I see what I can.
So if you are not a bird, or if you'd rather crawl close to the ground. Take a sec to look through your eyes not your head or ears or anything else, because what we've got here is beautiful.
cheers,
Jess :]
I want to be soaring in the clouds like a bird someday, high in the sky someday, I'd like to be free as a bird someday. Not free falling, just freedom. I think the meaning of that word has been lost lately. If you know one thing you know them all, right? I think that's the definition of a smart ass. Have you ever chosen to look from a different perspective before? Like from a bird in the sky. I want to look down and see it all, live through it all, fly through it all.
I think it is most important to realise that we are birds, we all are birds. We shit everywhere, go too fast, flap too hard, and some of us sit in the high parts of the trees and just sit. Content. Be content you say? Yes, content. Content may not be synonimous with happiness, but for pete's sake it's damn better than going too fast. I can't see much, so I see what I can.
So if you are not a bird, or if you'd rather crawl close to the ground. Take a sec to look through your eyes not your head or ears or anything else, because what we've got here is beautiful.
cheers,
Jess :]
Thursday, June 2, 2011
the great pretender, sun sound
[one hundred, fifty]
I don't feel like writing much today. I feel like when the sun goes down on a hot day, and then everything is cold except the ground. The ground is still boiling hot but the air and the water and the sand is all cold but the pavement, the conductor, is still sweltering. The heat of the weekend has died down but under foot there still lies this boiling, troubling, sweltering, sticking feeling, this terrible feeling. I hate having things unfinished, that's why I write to-do lists and reminders sod have numerous daytimers and reminding notes, but then there's just complicating stressful notions, that is just painful, painful in plain sight.
Save me today, anyone, bring me up to speed, brighten me off, cool off my feet.
If you had a wonderful weekend I am happy for you, if you had an okay weekend I hear ya, if your birthday was yesterday (sunday) i LOVE YA! And if you are ready for things to pick up, they will, it's just a matter of gettin' the faith.
I gots the faith, yo.
take care,
Jess :]
I don't feel like writing much today. I feel like when the sun goes down on a hot day, and then everything is cold except the ground. The ground is still boiling hot but the air and the water and the sand is all cold but the pavement, the conductor, is still sweltering. The heat of the weekend has died down but under foot there still lies this boiling, troubling, sweltering, sticking feeling, this terrible feeling. I hate having things unfinished, that's why I write to-do lists and reminders sod have numerous daytimers and reminding notes, but then there's just complicating stressful notions, that is just painful, painful in plain sight.
Save me today, anyone, bring me up to speed, brighten me off, cool off my feet.
If you had a wonderful weekend I am happy for you, if you had an okay weekend I hear ya, if your birthday was yesterday (sunday) i LOVE YA! And if you are ready for things to pick up, they will, it's just a matter of gettin' the faith.
I gots the faith, yo.
take care,
Jess :]
lightening across
[one hundred, forty nine]
lightening across the music scene,
spinning faster than the speed of light,
fizzing slowly through the shaking and rattling,
the rolling of the tune dropped low,
until all that was heard was the last two notes,
a cadence across the sky.
brought down lower, whispering bass,
strumming slowly, finally,
past the end, past the last few,
a sunset on six bars,
the staff dragged lines across the sky,
if only it was read.
composed faster, speeding, a crescendo of tune,
of melody, harmony,
harmonising across the setting stream of solid lines,
broken lines, indecisive shaky lines,
the timbre broke and fell, shattering,
and it was the actual end.
love,
Jess :]
lightening across the music scene,
spinning faster than the speed of light,
fizzing slowly through the shaking and rattling,
the rolling of the tune dropped low,
until all that was heard was the last two notes,
a cadence across the sky.
brought down lower, whispering bass,
strumming slowly, finally,
past the end, past the last few,
a sunset on six bars,
the staff dragged lines across the sky,
if only it was read.
composed faster, speeding, a crescendo of tune,
of melody, harmony,
harmonising across the setting stream of solid lines,
broken lines, indecisive shaky lines,
the timbre broke and fell, shattering,
and it was the actual end.
love,
Jess :]
late postings
[one hundred forty eight]
bind and shuffle
I was looking at a pack of cards today, and I figured that it would be easier to shuffle if there was some way to keep them all together but in the same direction as they lay, and then shake them. I guess it is sort of a skill I never really cared for, shuffling cards, but it would be an interesting invention nonetheless. I wonder if card dealers in Vegas think about this, probably, I don't know if this has anything to do with my new found desire to gamble...
I really would like to play blackjack,in a sbig shiny casino and a nice dress, drinking gin and tonic with sunglasses on. I've been watching too much of '21'. I love that movie, probably because it's so glamorous so fabulous. I want to be fabulous. That's attainable, right?
I think everyone I know is fabulous, so, maybe it'll rub off on me.
take care,
Jess :]
bind and shuffle
I was looking at a pack of cards today, and I figured that it would be easier to shuffle if there was some way to keep them all together but in the same direction as they lay, and then shake them. I guess it is sort of a skill I never really cared for, shuffling cards, but it would be an interesting invention nonetheless. I wonder if card dealers in Vegas think about this, probably, I don't know if this has anything to do with my new found desire to gamble...
I really would like to play blackjack,in a sbig shiny casino and a nice dress, drinking gin and tonic with sunglasses on. I've been watching too much of '21'. I love that movie, probably because it's so glamorous so fabulous. I want to be fabulous. That's attainable, right?
I think everyone I know is fabulous, so, maybe it'll rub off on me.
take care,
Jess :]
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